I'M NOT ME ANYMORE: SURPRISE BIRTHDAY PARTY 29.08.18

29 August 2018
6:00PM @ 18:00PM
Taman Awam Teluk Likas Kota Kinabalu Sabah

Today is my 25th birthday and i think no one cares about it because no one text me or come to my house for surprise me. I guess no one remembered it and forgot about me. And is really sad because i always the one who are very excited when celebrate everyone birthday. Nope,i am not sad because no wishing from my friend. I sad because no wish from my family. I haven't gotten anything from them and yahh nobody cares about me 👀 The last time i remembered i sad on my birthday when i turn 21st because i want celebrate with my dad but my dad not here in earth anymore so i decided to be alone and no party because i missing my dad and i just couldn't hold back the tears or sad today turning 25th.. I feel so alone and like nobody in my life even cares about me. What kind of family don't even say happy birthday?I know nobody here cares either I guess I'm just getting my feeling out because this made me sad all day. It just makes me realize I don't really need to cares about them anymore and nobody really cares about me.

My husband know how enjoy i am when with all my siblings and cousin together for celebrating my day but i think he also don't care about it and it's really make me hurt and sad inside. I Just not showing it and express my feeling. My birthday i'm just doing nothing. Everyday doing same thing and i don't expect much from my husband on my morning birthday and i Wake up like everyday getting ready to work having simple breakfast. Sit at office,playing with my iphone and searching blogger and playing games and having lunch then wait for my husband to pick me up from work. And just like that i spend my 8hours everyday at work!

While waiting for my husband,i receive whatsapp from my friend ask me to hang out for chillax on my birthday so i say yes and texting my husband no need to pick me up and going out with my friend for celebrating birthday. But my husband not agree to going out with them because he planned to bring me for dinner birthday,suddenly receive a text from my cousin ask me to go at her work place because she will staying at my home. My cousin stanley also ask me to going back home to my mom place but i also tell him i will going out with my friend and my husband also bring me for dinner. I was really dilemma that time. I have no idea with one should i join.

Because i love to be with my siblings n cousins so i decide to be with them. My dad always said to me "FAMILY ALWAYS COMES FIRST" .
Actually i don't think that they have a surprise for me,i just feel like they don't appreciate me because none of them wishing me at family group. So i assume that they don't even care about my birthday and they ask to come home because my mom cook only. Even i feel so disappointed with them but i calm myself and told myself "is okay,all of them still budak2..They don't know nothing" That words calm myself and then i can go there with happy face and not showing to them i am disappointed.

While waiting i scrolling my facebook instagram and reply all birthday wish from my fb ig friends.
My husband come with a big smile from his face,i know he must be really scared when i ask about surprise birthday because he know i like a surprise so much so i didn't mention anything about that but i told him about my mom cook for me today and so kesian because my siblings and cousin do collection for ask my mom cook my fav food. I am angry my husband why didn't ask them about this,why he didn't think about my birthday to celebrate with my family while my family do collection for me. But my husband keep silent and say SORRY SORRY SORRY. When i'm think it back,my husband look so pity because i keep blame him. Sorry hubby.

Before going back to my mom place i ask my husband to fetch my cousin at Teluk Lipat Likas because she will going back with us to my place and staying at my home after that so we drive to Likas area and is so jammed to go that area. That time i feel nothing i just think to fetch my cousin there and bring her to buy something to bring at my mom place. That's all and i don't expect nothing more will happen. We reach at Teluk Likas,i'll text my cousin we have arrived at the destination but she ask me to wait for her and we wait at car but my husband need to find toilet so my husband ask me to go out while waiting for him and my cousin. I said okay let's going out,and my husband go to toilet area and me direct straight to the beach. How i miss this feeling. The wind from the sea and the and the sound of sea is very comfortable. Suddenly i think of my cousin stanley. I tell him we need to go for picnic tomorrow. I miss that moment with all of them.

BEACH WITH SUNSET


MY FAV PLACE

CALM

Walking on the beach alone feel so good after long day at work place. Bring me to the old times,no burden no responsibility and enjoy my life so much. But i am happy with my life now too. I have my caring and loving husband even there's a lot of problem every day comes but when i'm back home i saw him with smile and i forgot everything and i just wanna be him like that all of my life. While recalling all good and bad memories my phone ringing and is my cousin Joy. She ask me to go at her place because she can't she me that time. She ask me to go to the toilet area so i walking to that area and i see a few people that i know at the pondok-pondok looking over me to walk their place. And yeahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh is all my siblings and family is thereeeeeeee for surprise me for my birthday at my fav place. OMG,i am so speechless and shocking because i never expect anything from them or my husband and its my husband plan and get support from Stanley. No words to say,i just keep silent and feel so touched that time. I only can say,thank you for all of this. I can't believe this is real. My cousin decorate the pondok with diy lantern lamp and diy birthday board and all they wish is there. A steamboat and bbq from them for me. Cake from my fav baker and fav flavor. Dear family,i love you all so much.

Is really surprise and they can do it without me. My husband the one who ask my cousin Stanley for prepare everything for me while he listen i talk nonsense words. Hahaha. Sorry dear,i thought you forgot about me. Sorry for talk like that to you. I feel so happy for all of this you do it for me. Thanks for the surprise party and my surprise present. I love you from bottom of my heart husband.